Me, Myself and I..

The exams are this week so I didn't get a chance to really use the computer.(Gotta study hard ya know.) Anyway, my birthday last week was pretty plain. Nothing serious and nothing exciting. I'll write about what happened in another story. As for this week, which is about to end, I'll be : Sitting for my last exam paper, statistics. I'll be in the examination hall in a few hours to come. Planning for a hiking trip to Gunung Korbu and its twin peak, Gunung gayung. I'll be going with a few of my college mates on the 18th of November and expected to finish by the 22nd. Prayers are always welcome. Celebrating the end of the exams. I'll be going nowhere and I'll be stuck in Ktj. But I'll try my best to celebrate. There'll be a 7 a side football match coming up next week. I'll be playing for the winning team- the Lower 6 team. My sprained ankle has yet to heal. The swell has not subsided but the pain has gone. Not completely but enough for me to play games. I just hope there's nothing serious. That's all for now. G'day and may god bless..

Names..

I just discovered that my parents have the gift of prophecy. A few days ago I was chatting with some of my friends when someone started talking about names. It was particularly hilarious to know that my friend's name meant "golden dragon" in chinese. Another friend of mine was the "Great wind". As for me, my name meant - "great and handsome". This of course led me to discover my parent's gift of propehcy =P.
Thinking about names, I ponder upon the time when human beings were not bright enough to give themselves names. How exactly did they call each other? Well, there are just somethings that I'll never know. Nevertheless, at some point in time, some smart human being must have gave a name to someone. This of course became a culture which has been passed down from generation to generation over the cemturies.
Names are a word or a phrase that constitutes the distinctive designation of a person or thing. Names represent the person we are and most of the times, names depict the person we are. However, there are certain scenarios where people don't live up to their names.
I would safely say that I'm one of those scenarios. Its hard to live up to what my name means. Being great and handsome isn't an easy job. If you think that I'm having a hard time trying to live up to my chinese name, my english name is worse. Peter means rock. How in the world am I supposed to be a stone?
Well, I don't use my name much. Others use my name more than I do. They call me by name. I don't. Maybe thats why I don't live up to my name. I don't use it enough. But giving my name serious thought, it certainly would be nice to be able to live up to it. Being great and handsome isn't too bad. What does your name mean?

Talentime..

Talentime was last saturday. It wasn't as spectacular as I expected it to be, but nevertheless, I would still consider it worth watching. The best performances were the instrumentals. The singing and the band category were more of a dissapointment. But who am I to comment? I can't even play any instrument that well anyway.
That night, I witnessed the display of varying talents. Some sang, some played insruments and some did both. Most of the people were watching in their seats enjoying the music, or rather, trying their best to. I was among some of those who were trying very hard to enjoy themselves. (The music wasn't that great).
But admist my boredom, I realised something. Every performance was different. None were the same. No one in their right mind would sing the same song some other had sang sang just minutes before. But as one thought leads to another, this thought led me to think why exactly the performers chose the songs they were to perform.
I didn't bother to ask them personally. What I derived was that they liked the song and they have sufficient talent to reproduce the song on that night itself. And they did. What struck me was that everyone has different taste. And everyone has different capabilities.
Owing to what I learnt in biology in form 5, I would safely say that no 2 people are alike. Everyone is different, whether in genes or personality.
Knowing that everyone is different, it simply is amazing how well humans can work together. Not every living thing posseses this ability to be united in thought. Of course some people don't get along that well, but with that exception, humans in general get along with each other pretty well. Without any doubt, that is talent too.
I get along well with many people. Not everyone though. Those I get along with well, I usually call them friends. We understand each other well, we have the same thoughts, and we share something in common. We are united in mind and in spirit. Those who I don't get along well with, however, are not my enemies. I merely call it the lacking of talent on someone's part.
Sitting in the hall for 2 hours listening to dull music certainly wasn't the nicest thing to do. But I certainly had the opportunity to display my talents too. Everyone did. We were all united in mind and in spirit. We shared something in common. We were bored. And we got along well together and all of them were my friends for that night. We were united in the fellowship of boredom wishing that things would finish as soon as possible.
Succintly put, talentime this year was a great time. There was a great display of talent by the students, namely the spectators. However, the judges made mistakes- the prizes were given to the performers. But its ok with me. I'm sure it is for everyone else too.

Me, Myself and I..

The past week has been suprisingly wonderful. There weren't many catastrophies and nothing suprising. It was a dull week. Anyway, I picked up a new sport- tennis. It's fun but there still alot more for me to learn. This week's agenda : The exams are only a week away. I have finally found my stride and have been sleeping late nights. Studying seems so much more relevant to me now compared to last week. There will be a weekend off starting from Thursday evening till Sunday night. I won't be going home though. I chose not to. I need time to study and going home isn't the best place to study. ( Too many distractions ) My birthday is round the corner and I will be celebrating it all alone in a God-Forsaken Place called Mantin. What could be worse? Almost nothing, except having to celebrate it 2 days before my exams... Arghh... I forecast another boring week ahead. Thats all for now. ta-ta

Why do bad things happen to good people?

My handphone was stolen 2 days ago. Since then, there is a question that seems to be lingering in my head - Why do good things happen to bad people, and why do bad things happen to good people? I'll skip the first part of the question and go on to the 2nd part- Why do bad things happen to good people?
Truthfully, I don't know. I'll never know. But I did came up with theory. Maybe bad things happen to bad people after all. Its just that we never seem to realise that we, in some way or another are bad. Most of the time, we consider ourselves better than others. Hence, bad things that happen to us seems unjustified.
Take myself for example. I'm not all that nice a person. I back bite, I lie (usually obvious white lies) and I sleep in class. I don't think I qualify to be a good person. But on the other hand, that doesn't make me qualify to be a bad person either. So, I'm somewhere in between. I'm in a state of limbo; neither here nor there. But that doesn't answer the question does it?
Well, maybe I have been naughty sometimes. And maybe that little naugthiness caused me my handphone. Maybe. Maybe not. But I'll stick to the thought that my naugthiness caused me my phone. At least then, I'll be happy that there is a reason for all this things happening.
I can't complain forever. So, I see no point in complaining for my handphone is most probably gone for good- stolen by someone, sold to the black market, passed on from on person to the next. Damn those people that support black market products. (when there is demand, there is stealing).
Well, I choose to move on. I'll need to buy a new handphone, a new telephone line and I'll have to retrieve all the phone numbers I've lost. I'll survive. As for the thief- what goes around comes around. Someday someone will be nicking his underpants and he'll have no one to blame but himself. Too bad for him. I'll have to scout for good offers before buying another handphone. Where is the nearest black market again?

Glorious suffering

I would think that I'm not the only person that agrees that painful experiences has suprising teaching properties. Somehow or another, we just seem to learn so much more from experiences as compared to the text book. Some people call it trial and error, some people call it learning from mistakes. I call it glorious suffering. When we undergo bitter moments, we are transformed to be a different person; one who looks at life from a different perspective and does not succumb to the ethos of the world. Someone once said that "we'll never learn the meaning of life unless we go through pain"
I wrote a poem for english week entitled glorious suffering. Its definitely not a wonderfully authored poem, but I tried my best to put it into words. Here goes :

When unforseen trials and tribulations befall me,
I resentfully scorn the circumstances that be,
And in despair, I silently curse my fate,
And endure the wrath that trouble creates,
I look up to heaven to seek justification,
I have wronged noone, why should this be my portion?
I am innocent, I will be vindicated,
And have everything return as if the day never started,
But my ceaseless cries echo throughout the heavens,
The day turns bleak; my future- uncertain,
But wisdom; she tells me of a different story,
That a ray of hope shines incessantly,
For trouble comes, then it goes,
It passes swiftly like shifting shadows,
Leaving behind footprints of transfiguration,
Forever changing the ground it has trodden,
For beyond my reflection reveals a bloke,
Featured like me, having my scope,
If not for trouble, I am not 'me',
The person I am supposed to be,
So when unforseen trials and tribulations befall me,
Be it as it may, contended I will be,
With maturity, I've learned to accept my fate,
And travel the endless path that patiently awaits,
And learn from the little lessons that trouble inparts,
For the things that hurt, they instruct.

A lesson from Haloween Night.

As I have said in my blog sometime earlier, we celebrated haloween night on the 9th of october. In a sense it was great. But not everyone turned up that night and things were a little gloomy. Looking on the bright side, Haloween wouldn't be Haloween if things weren't scary. So, the gloominess helped a little. We had a dee jay come in and mix songs so that people could dance. However, dancing wouldn't be the right word. Clubbing would be more appropriate. I had the opportunity to see some people on their wildest behavior, "shaking their bon-bon" to the beat of the music. I tried to stay away from the dance floor, but my friends urged me to join them, so I relented. When I was on the dance floor, I made quite a few observations. Interesting ones. Besides how ugly some people can look while dancing, I made some observations about myself too... I Am Not A Dancer. Maybe I am a dancer, but I'm the type that simply screws up at every single move. Maybe it has something to do with my ego. I just don't want to forget about everything; how I look, how others would look at me, how others will think of me, etc.. So, I shy away from expressing myself in a manner that requires me to be in action. I'd rather express myself through music or writing or speaking but not through dancing. I just can't lay down my pride. I won't let everyone see who is in me. Most of the times, I find myself in situations where my ego brings about problems. And most of the times, people misunderstand me. I would think its safe to say that many people would agree that I'm a little arrogant sometimes. Its just the way I act, the way I move and the way I speak. Indeed, actions speak louder than words. But, under this thick layer of pride, lies a humble person. One who wants to learn from others and to consider everyone his teacher. He doesn't want others to look up to him, he doesn't want others to revere him. He wants to be a little bit of everyone one else. I want to badly shed this layer of pride. Its an extra burden to carry; too heavy for me to bear. So help me Lord I pray. Let me learn to be humble. Let me learn from every single experience. Even one on haloween night.

Me, Myself and I..

The last week was simply wonderful. Though I was down with my ankle injury, I still managed to wobble around. At least, I was healthy enough to wobble to the rugby field to see the finals. We had a steam boat celebration yesterday somewhere in Seremban. It wasn't the nicest food I've ever tasted but thats not the point. The point is that we won and we were celebrating. Apart from that, the week was pretty boring except that I missed class on Thursday after sustaining my ankle injury. As for this week: I'm feeling almost tensed up. My exams are in about 2 weeks time. Note that I'm feeling almost tensed up. That's what I'm worried about. I usually am very tensed up a fortnight before the exams, but this time I'm not. When I'm tensed up, I study. When I'm not, I don't. I really am hoping to get tensed up soon. I am healing at a miraculous pace. The doctor said that I should rest for at least a week. I played tennis yesterday and felt fit as ever. (except for the occasional tinge in my ankle) The fasting month will be starting this Friday. I think. No, I'm not fasting. But my other friends are. Don't get the wrong idea that I'm trying to control my weight. My dog is still sick. I mean like really sick. The last time I saw him was last week. I"m not sure if he's better. So, people out there, cheer him on. Thats all for now folks. Watch out for "Me, myself and I.." next week. Ta-ah

The almost greatest finals..

Only one match seperated us from defending our titles as senior rugby champions. We were to play Naquiuddin in the finals. It really was a wonderful match. Everything worked as planned. Our penalty moves, passing, tackling. Simply everything worked as planned. Eventually we won by 3 tries to none. It was a great final and we won the whole competition without having to concede any tries. We won with a clean sheet. We lived up to other people's expectations (we were defending champs) and we delivered. As usual, winning always feels great. But more importantly, we had fun eventhough the team was plagued by injuries. Yes, we look forward to next year's inter-house rugby competitions and hope that we'll be able to increase the tally to 4 next year. All in all, it was a great final. However, it wasn't the greatest finals. It lacked something special, a little something that would make the whole final complete. It lacked me. (i was still injured.)

The not so glorious injury...

In the second match, we were up against Imran. We had thought it would be a fairly easy match but we were clearly mistaken. In the first half, we only scored one try and failed to convert. The second half was more melodramatic when our beloved center(me) got injured.
It really was a silly injury. Someone kicked the ball, and I chased after it. Somehow, My ankle got twisted and I sprained my ankle. I fell. I got up as fast as possible, hoping nobody saw that embarrasing moment and limped away. I really couldn't walk much. I was substituted out, much to my dismay and sat at the outlines icing my sprained ankle. I wanted to play.
Even as I sat at the outlines, I was really in pain. The sprained ankle didn't really hurt much but my shattered pride hurt me the most. It would have been so much more glorious if I had been tackled by 3 men at the same time and got injured. But I sprained my ankle on my own account, sprained my ankle and fell to the ground even when noone was tackling me. I felt really stupid, I still do.
The match carried on without me. The rest of the game saw many high tackles been made. Many of my teammates got injured and most people complained that Imran was not showing good sportsmanship. But of all the injuries that have happened, my injury was the most severe and all my ego was reduced to dust and ashes.
In the end, we won the match by 2 tries to none. Certainly it felt good to win. But it would have felt even better if I were playing. So far we have had a clean sheet and we intend to keep it in the finals against Naquiyuddin.

Breakthrough...

The first rugby match was against Nadzaruddin. We expected a tough challenge and true enough, it was a tough game. The first half was terrible. We only scored one try. We failed to convert and our mental strength was deteriorating.
It was pretty much obvious that we were the better team. We played the whole game virtually on their half but we failed miserably to finish them. We wanted to make it fast and painless but they just kept us from the touch line. As our will to win slowly faded, we seriously needed something to liven up our spirits. We needed a breakthrough.
Then it all happened. The Fly half passed the ball to the center. The center kicked the ball, then chased it like a panther. The ball reached the opponents, but they failed to catch it. The ball bounced right into the path of the center and the center catched it and sped of with the ball. It was the second try of the game for Nadzimuddin. Our spirits were lifted.
After the second try, the other tries came tumbling in. In the end we won; the score 20-0 (4 tries, no conversions). All in all, it was a wonderful match. We did what we had to, and we won. But most importantly of all, we had a breakthrough. And we really should give a pat on the back to the center who made it all happen. His name is Peter.. =P

Me, myself and I..

The parents and teacher's meeting went well. I didn't get any scolding from my teachers or my parents except for occasional nagging for being a little to lazy. Other than that, I think that I"m doing fine. The weekend back at home was fun. I drove myself around to quite a few places and I totally enjoyed being near to civilization.

As for this week,

• The senior rugby interhouse competitions are starting. I'm in the first team and I'll be needing heaps of prayers. This is the first time, I'm actually feeling scared that I'll get some chronic injury and may end up paralyzed for the rest of my life.
• There will be a haloween social night this saturday. I'll be screening some horror movies. Due to some complications, things aren't really working out as planned. I still have the slightest idea how were gonna screen the movie.
• I'm getting the flu. Hope that I'll get better soon.

Thats almost all for this week. I'll be back next week in me, myself and I. Till then, salam mesra.