Thursday, February 10, 2005

The Chinese dilemma...

There are a million ways to usher in the year of the cockrell. Some people play with crackers, some people make new year's resolutions, others have reunion dinners. Somehow, this year seems to be a year of unconvention for me.
After the family dinner, me and my brothers were really bored so we decided to go get some fire crackers to liven things up a little. We drove for half an hour but to no avail. So we returned home. On the way back home, we bumped into some of my old buddies at the field near my house- we decided to play basketball. We really had fun.
An hour and a half after that, an old friend called me out for supper. I thought it would be a good idea. We went to Mc Donalds at 12. I discovered that I'm not the only one who enjoys ushering the new year eating fries and drinking coke at our favourite fast food outlet. Considering the fact that it was already late, I would say that there were many people. Anyway, I had a great time chatting with my friend.
Putting aside all the fun I had, I wonder if celebrating Chinese New Year in this manner is too radical- while my other chinese counterparts are busy back at home fulfilling their racial obligations, I'm playing basketball and having supper at McDees. Is my identity being diluted by not conforming to the traditions of my forefathers? Am I being less and less "chinese" in any way? Or am I just excited to celebrate Chinese New Year without being influenced by anything "chinese"?
Possibly yes. The fact that I've never identified myself with any race has to count for something. I grew up in an english speaking family; I can't speak chinese. I spent most of my adolescence amongst malays. People think I'm Sarawakian. I just don't fit in. Maybe I'll fit in sooner or later. Maybe I won't at all. For all you know, I might be the founder of a new race- the "I'm not sure which race I am, coz I don't belong anywhere" race.
But then again, being chinese isn't about fitting in. Its like a complimentary feature that comes with the package. You don't get to choose (life never is fair). I was chinese yesterday, I am chinese today and I'll still be chinese 20 years later. I dont' have to identify with it to be one. I am one. (just a little more liberal, that's all)
Enough said about being chinese or not. It gets really confusing after sometime. For conclusion's sake, I'll just call myself a liberal chinese. And I think its good that way because I'm still getting the red packets. And as long as those red packets keep coming, I'll be more than glad to be chinese. Its my gift, and my curse.



Mc Donalds, Bandar Utama- We just can't live without it..




0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home